?????

Well I said that I would probably not be writing any blogs this week.. and the next day, here I am. I guess sometimes this blog thing is thearuptic. I don't really have a particular subject that I am going to be writing on, so this may jump around quite a bit.



I am asking myself, and really the Lord, many questions here lately. I am going through a time in which thinking is becoming my enemy. The more I think about this "thing", the more I tend to dwell on it, so I am trying at all costs to not focus on this particular thing. (I know it would make more sense if I could tell you what it is, but I will not be doing that... so bear with me) But by not thinking about this particular "thing" am I avoiding healing from it? Or, is this just the way we are suppossed to get over things? If we just try to forgive and forget will that be the best way to go about things? Then, my thoughts go to, well everyone is different, and each person heals differently. So, maybe I just deal with it in the way that I know is best for my heart. But, honestly... I have no clue what is best for my heart. I am at such a standstill with what I need to do in order to heal from this "thing".

I looked up this verse last night:
Put on then, as God's chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassion, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience; bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other, as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive. And above all these put on LOVE, which binds everything together in perfect harmony. And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body. AND BE THANKFUL. Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly, teaching and admonishing one another in all wisdom, singing psalms and hymns and spritutal songs, with thankfulness to God. And whatever you do in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the father through him.

Colossians 3:12-17



I guess what I am trying to get at is is what is the best way to heal? It says it right there, but the human part of me sure does see that that is a lot harder than it looks. Because one, I do not have patience... which is maybe a lot of why God is teaching me what he is. Two, sometimes I love to a fault.. if that is possible. What I mean by this is I tend to get a hurt a lot, because I am not careful with people who have hurt me before. I tend to let it go and just come back for more...



Okay, lots of jumbled thoughts... if you have any thoughts on what I said, if it makes any sense, let me know.

Love you all!!

Ash



ps- I must clarify.. please do not take this as I feel that I am perfect, and others aren't. I just have a bunch of thoughts in my head, and sometimes it is good to get them down.