Sometimes life throws you a curve ball and you just gotta rollllll with it..... or so i have heard. my curve ball has actually been a result of choices and decisions I have made, so I do not really know if that is considered a curve ball. what do you think?
The Lord's graciousness has really overwhelmed me the past few days. you think since he is such a great God, it would overwhelm me constantly, huh?! unfortunately i am constantly looking at myself, and what all is going on with me, instead of looking to him and serving him and serving others. its a ridiculous cycle. but, i am thankful that the lord has started showing me soo much and is allowing me to see my sinful self, and allowing me to see his grace and mercy in it. soooo thankful for that. the past few days i have just wanted to grab a cup of coffee with someone and just talk about my Jesus. talk about what he is doing, what he has done, hear what he is doing in the other person's life. i really think this is something that stirs my affections for him. you know as crazy as it would sound to talk about this man to someone who may know nothing about Him, know nothing about his grace, who may think i am just some crazy religious texas person (you know the ppl that i am talking about)... I just long to converse about the Lord. how good he is, how gracious...ect. i don't know, i just am having this overflowing of my heart and just want to talk about Him ya know.
I am realizing a lot about myself. I am involved in this step-study, which is part of the recovery process at my church. it has been amazing, and so, so eye-opening. i have gotten to see my sin issues, and just start to deal with them. it has not always been fun, but it has been good. ya know what i mean? (for the one person that reads this...hehe, ya know?!?) Sometimes when I am in the mood, its just best for me to blog it out. Plus, if you get tired of listening, you can just stop reading ya know ;) I think blogging is therapeutic...but I digress.... things the Lord is showing me, teaching me, or I am just realizing as a result of many things...
1. I am extremely selfish. WAY TOO selfish. I care what I want, and I have been in my own little world that has wanted what ashley wants right now, and if I dont get it I pout. It is time for this to change. I don't know how that is going to look, but the Lord is showing me that it needs to change.
2. I worry too much. Really, we shouldn't worry at all. But I do. This is also something that I am trying to give over to the Lord, but it is still a process.
3. I am a hopeless romantic and I can't help it. The past few months I have tried to stay away from the sappy love movies... shoot, I haven't watched the notebook in A LONG time... but nevertheless, I am a hopeless romantic. I love everything about love. I want to be cute with the man of my dreams. But that is just it... the man of my dreams, not just some guy that I settle for. I am trying to work this out in my head as well. What is the happy medium between loving romance, wanting it, yet not making it an idol in your life? Something I am working through. Plus... lets just face it, im the girl that says awwwwwww to everything. haha, but seriously. i really think that i had placed marriage in my life as an idol, so sorting through this whole "i love romance, i can't wait thing..." vs. really, am i kidding, can i wait. trying to figure out what is the healthy part of desiring love and companionship, and then trying to decipher what isn't healthy. that is something i am sorting out right now....
In the mean time however, can i just say i have been watching some sappy love movies, and oh how i have missed them.
4. Can i just tell you that as much as i want to plan my future, and although i do not know what is going to happen in the next year, or where i am going to be.... i have a peace. this is huge for me. its a new found peace, a peace that the lord is showing me i can have when i rest in him. (or for me, try as hard as i can to rest in him.... i will get there.)
5. I love you guys sooo much, thank you for being apart of my life... bc I have a feeling if you read this to the very end, you love me a whole lot and mean a whole lot to me :)
Till later my sweet friends,
Saturday, April 26, 2008
Monday, April 21, 2008
Closure
Closure is a word that I have started to become very acquainted with in the past few weeks. Closure is a good thing, and I know this, and I know head-wise/knowledge wise it is the right thing...telling my heart the same thing is a different story however. I think, or rather, I know that I have a hard time letting things go. I really do...those closest to me know this fact and love me through it.... however, its time to let go. Way past time probably.
This afternoon I decided to take a sabbatical if you will, and I drove home. (Parents house- Houston) I need a little daddy and mom time. My dad has this amazing knack to just tell me exactly what I need to hear, not necessarily what I want to hear, and just everything always seems to click when we talk. They know me, and shoot me straight. My plan during the day tomorrow is sleep in, read, journal and pray. I love coming here to get away. It is so pretty in their neighborhood, my parents have a puppy (hehe, love him!), and just how much one-on-two time I get with my parentals. :)
New Things, Happenings, Nice Little Anecdotes....
1. Today I accepted a full-time sub position at MHS. I will teaching History, I know not what I'm certified in... but either way, good classroom management practice :)
2. Still praying about and applying to LOTS of schools for an English Position for the upcoming year. Please keep praying that one comes along... The Lord is good! Something will come up, I just don't know when... that is where my patience is being tested. I suck at being patient.
3. I went through my Inventory with my sponsor and love, Lauren, and it was a hard process, but I feel like sooo much is being revealed about me and just areas of sin in my life that need to be turned around. Our God is sooo gracious.
4. American Idol is one of my new favorite shows.... LOVE IT! I giggle every time little David
Archelta comes on... i want to put him in my pocket.
5. Even though I have graduated I think I am in a little bit of denial about all the rest of my friends graduating. I'm scared all my friends are going to move away, which might actually happen. Working on that as well....
6. One of my friends asked me what my summer plans were today, and that was when I realized.... I have no summer plans. A little scary and makes me want to get out my planner....eek.
7. The Lord is good, I am so thankful that the Lord is gracious enough to be refining me.
And now... a story to leave you. This was a story my mom told me today when I got home...
Mom: Ashie, guess what mommy did.
Ash: What, mom?
Mom: So me and daddy were at a BBQ cookoff, and there were people walking around asking us to try Wild Game. Of course, daddy was trying everything, so I thought I would too. First they asked if I wanted to try dove. So I tried it. Then they came around and offered me whale. I was like no.... I don't want any whale, thank you. Then your daddy said, "Baby, try it, I bet you will like it." So, I did. Of course, all I could think about was the fact that I was eating Whale so I put it down after I took a bite.
Ash: Mom, Whale? (I am notorious for ruining stories before they get through...)
Mom: Let me finish Ashie, when we got in the car I said to daddy, "Bobby, aren't you proud of me... I have had an eventful day. I tried dove AND whale!"
Dad: Sheri, Whale? It wasn't Whale, IT WAS QUAIL!!
Ash: oh, mom.....
bahahahaha. So if you ever wonder why I may be a little ditsy... exhibit A, Sheri Keplinger.
This afternoon I decided to take a sabbatical if you will, and I drove home. (Parents house- Houston) I need a little daddy and mom time. My dad has this amazing knack to just tell me exactly what I need to hear, not necessarily what I want to hear, and just everything always seems to click when we talk. They know me, and shoot me straight. My plan during the day tomorrow is sleep in, read, journal and pray. I love coming here to get away. It is so pretty in their neighborhood, my parents have a puppy (hehe, love him!), and just how much one-on-two time I get with my parentals. :)
New Things, Happenings, Nice Little Anecdotes....
1. Today I accepted a full-time sub position at MHS. I will teaching History, I know not what I'm certified in... but either way, good classroom management practice :)
2. Still praying about and applying to LOTS of schools for an English Position for the upcoming year. Please keep praying that one comes along... The Lord is good! Something will come up, I just don't know when... that is where my patience is being tested. I suck at being patient.
3. I went through my Inventory with my sponsor and love, Lauren, and it was a hard process, but I feel like sooo much is being revealed about me and just areas of sin in my life that need to be turned around. Our God is sooo gracious.
4. American Idol is one of my new favorite shows.... LOVE IT! I giggle every time little David
Archelta comes on... i want to put him in my pocket.
5. Even though I have graduated I think I am in a little bit of denial about all the rest of my friends graduating. I'm scared all my friends are going to move away, which might actually happen. Working on that as well....
6. One of my friends asked me what my summer plans were today, and that was when I realized.... I have no summer plans. A little scary and makes me want to get out my planner....eek.
7. The Lord is good, I am so thankful that the Lord is gracious enough to be refining me.
And now... a story to leave you. This was a story my mom told me today when I got home...
Mom: Ashie, guess what mommy did.
Ash: What, mom?
Mom: So me and daddy were at a BBQ cookoff, and there were people walking around asking us to try Wild Game. Of course, daddy was trying everything, so I thought I would too. First they asked if I wanted to try dove. So I tried it. Then they came around and offered me whale. I was like no.... I don't want any whale, thank you. Then your daddy said, "Baby, try it, I bet you will like it." So, I did. Of course, all I could think about was the fact that I was eating Whale so I put it down after I took a bite.
Ash: Mom, Whale? (I am notorious for ruining stories before they get through...)
Mom: Let me finish Ashie, when we got in the car I said to daddy, "Bobby, aren't you proud of me... I have had an eventful day. I tried dove AND whale!"
Dad: Sheri, Whale? It wasn't Whale, IT WAS QUAIL!!
Ash: oh, mom.....
bahahahaha. So if you ever wonder why I may be a little ditsy... exhibit A, Sheri Keplinger.
Friday, April 11, 2008
Realizations
You know when you have one of those moments where you are incredibly aware that everything has changed, and maybe there is just a small (rather large) chance that you have not completely moved on? Anybody....Anybody? Today I had one of those moments. I think a couple actually. This week has been one of those kick-you-in-the-butt weeks that makes you look at things, and realize that some things are better the way that they have become. It is better that things have become different and though things have been hard, things are finally starting to make sense. I may not have all the answers...far from it actually, maybe not even a plan (which I just love to have) but in these rare moments that I become incredibly aware of this fact, I have also become extremely thankful. That's right, thankful. How much I have fought that concept over and over again with this whole broken engagement/plan for the rest of my life thing being taken away.
But, have I looked at it in the wrong way? I think so. I want to live intentionally. I want to live in the moment...and be CONTENT in that moment. I know there will be times of unhappiness, that is true of life....its going to happen; but how wonderful would it be to just be in the moment, good or bad and know, KNOW that this is exactly where you are supposed to be. The thing is I believe with all my heart that the Lord is in control and that He has me right where he wants me, but more times than not, I don't think that I always live that out. I don't walk in freedom through that fact. This was my realization today. Things are the way they are supposed to be... I may not like it all the time, I may think that there is a "better" way that it could have played out (stupid, I know. I'm not God) but instead of being unhappy and sad at the way things have played out and the things I have found out, maybe I should choose to be thankful. Thankful for his grace, his mercy, his love, his incredible sense of humor and his love that I cannot even fathom. This is what I am going to try to walk in....freedom. Freedom to recognize that through the pain there is grace and understanding that only the Lord can have with someone. How great and mighty and WONDERFUL is our Sweet Jesus.
But, have I looked at it in the wrong way? I think so. I want to live intentionally. I want to live in the moment...and be CONTENT in that moment. I know there will be times of unhappiness, that is true of life....its going to happen; but how wonderful would it be to just be in the moment, good or bad and know, KNOW that this is exactly where you are supposed to be. The thing is I believe with all my heart that the Lord is in control and that He has me right where he wants me, but more times than not, I don't think that I always live that out. I don't walk in freedom through that fact. This was my realization today. Things are the way they are supposed to be... I may not like it all the time, I may think that there is a "better" way that it could have played out (stupid, I know. I'm not God) but instead of being unhappy and sad at the way things have played out and the things I have found out, maybe I should choose to be thankful. Thankful for his grace, his mercy, his love, his incredible sense of humor and his love that I cannot even fathom. This is what I am going to try to walk in....freedom. Freedom to recognize that through the pain there is grace and understanding that only the Lord can have with someone. How great and mighty and WONDERFUL is our Sweet Jesus.
Monday, March 31, 2008
You're All I need!
My heart is really heavy right now, but in a way that I don’t really know how to explain. However, I am in a writing sort of mood, so bear with me as I try to explain. There are have been so many things that have happened in the past 3 weeks and bottom line what comes to mind when thinking about everything and how things are starting to play out… is that God is gracious, kind, and above all HE IS BETTER. Do you ever have those days, where the only thing you can think of to do is just run to Jesus? These days, even though many times they are tough, are what I long for on a daily basis. Maybe not the part where they are really quote, unquote hard day; but the part about constantly running to Jesus. Never taking my gaze off Jesus, even for a second, is where I long to be. I long to constantly be engaging the Lord, and for the Lord to engaging me. For a soul that thirsts to go deeper on a regular basis, and not just is content with staying surface.
I am in a home group full of girls who, relationally wise, I have been able to go deep with and been able to bear my soul without condemnation. These girls are full of grace and love, and glimpses into who Christ has made us all to be, and is working on us to become. I am so thankful for what the Lord has done this past year. Broken engagement and all, the Lord is better. The Lord is good. The Lord is better than any relationship, friendship, material things… anything, that I could ever imagine or try to posesss. I cannot even imagine trying to look at a situation, or having days like this, without knowing the Lord. Knowing His love and joy are sufficient and will never fail.
There are many reasons that I have been heavy-hearted in the past couple of weeks, some of which, I do not plan on mentioning on my blog ;). However, I would like to share a few things. I am in a step-study currently though the church that I go to (The Village Church) and the Lord is doing some amazing things. I have had an anxiousness problem for about a year or so now. Maybe a little longer… but it has been most severe in the last year. I went to Recovery for several different things that coincided with my anxiousness and worry, but the Lord has begun to show me how much more it is about my Pride and Fear of man, and when really getting down to it… my control issues and taking my gaze off of the Lord… if even for a second. This not only has been an amazing process, but it has also been hard. Bittersweet perhaps… but more sweet J Not only is the Lord so gracious to give me glimpses into my depraved soul, but he is gracious enough to start showing me some healing in some areas that I did not know if I would ever be healed of. I have, and I am still finding out who I am in HIM. Not who I am in man’s eyes, but instead looking to Him for the grace and Love that only HE can give. How lucky we are to have a Sweet Jesus who took the wrath of our sins on the cross so that we could receive this amazing love. It is in a word unfathomable that he did such a thing, but how grateful I am. I am sure I will never be thankful enough, or fully understand the wrath that He endured on the cross, so that we may be free… but nevertheless, I am in constant awe of His grace and kindness.
I just found out that one of my dear friends, April, has cancer. This type of cancer is very rare, and can not be treated with chemo or radiation. I cannot say enough about this woman’s character and love for the Lord. Her faith is unwavering, and the way she is handling this all is far beyond I can even fathom. I have no clue how I would handle such news, but she knows that this is all apart of the Lords will. As much as I know that the Lord is in control, it is hard for me to have that kind of faith sometimes. I cannot tell you enough about April and her sweet character that she has shown me in just the little time that we have known one another, but in one word she is Faithful to our sweet Jesus. She knows his plan is far better than ours, and his will will prevail above our own. I ask you to pray for April. She is an amazing 22 year old woman who loves the Lord deeply and would appreciate your prayers for COMPLETE healing. I know prayer works. I pray that you will see this and commit to pray for her. She is an amazing woman is who is going to do great things for the Lord. I also ask that you pray for her pain levels. The tumor is on her muscle, which I can guess is VERY painful. They are going back in in a couple of weeks to remove more of the tumor. Cutting into the muscle is supposed to be a very painful process, so I just ask that you also pray that her pain level is minimal with all of these procedures going on.
I know I have put this on here before, but I would like to leave you with two songs…. Love you guys.
“Waiting Room”
I will run, I cannot walk. I will sing when there is no song, I will pray when there is no prayer. I will listen when I cannot hear. Sitting in the waiting room of silence. Waiting for that still, soft voice I know. Offering my words to the roof tops in your house… trusting that this closet’s where you are.
Lord, I know if you change my mind, you will change my heart in time. Soveriegn Lord, this time is from you. So, I sit in the waiting room of silence. Because its all about you.
I will fight, I cannot fear. I will trust when you don’t seem real. I tell when I cannot speak. I will step when I cannot see. Sitting in the waiting room of Silence, waiting for that still, soft voice I know. Offering my words up to the rooftops in your house. Trusting that this closet is where you are….
Lord I know if you change my mind, you will change my heart in time. Soveriegn Lord this time is from you, so I sit in the waiting room.
“My Hope”
You’re All I need. Apart from you, I can’t breathe. You’re all I need. Apart from you, I can’t see that… I’m broken, and bent sin, I’m desperate, and dirty within. I’m broken, and bent to sin. I’m desperate, and dirty within. You are my Hope! You are my Joy! You are my reason for living!!
I am in a home group full of girls who, relationally wise, I have been able to go deep with and been able to bear my soul without condemnation. These girls are full of grace and love, and glimpses into who Christ has made us all to be, and is working on us to become. I am so thankful for what the Lord has done this past year. Broken engagement and all, the Lord is better. The Lord is good. The Lord is better than any relationship, friendship, material things… anything, that I could ever imagine or try to posesss. I cannot even imagine trying to look at a situation, or having days like this, without knowing the Lord. Knowing His love and joy are sufficient and will never fail.
There are many reasons that I have been heavy-hearted in the past couple of weeks, some of which, I do not plan on mentioning on my blog ;). However, I would like to share a few things. I am in a step-study currently though the church that I go to (The Village Church) and the Lord is doing some amazing things. I have had an anxiousness problem for about a year or so now. Maybe a little longer… but it has been most severe in the last year. I went to Recovery for several different things that coincided with my anxiousness and worry, but the Lord has begun to show me how much more it is about my Pride and Fear of man, and when really getting down to it… my control issues and taking my gaze off of the Lord… if even for a second. This not only has been an amazing process, but it has also been hard. Bittersweet perhaps… but more sweet J Not only is the Lord so gracious to give me glimpses into my depraved soul, but he is gracious enough to start showing me some healing in some areas that I did not know if I would ever be healed of. I have, and I am still finding out who I am in HIM. Not who I am in man’s eyes, but instead looking to Him for the grace and Love that only HE can give. How lucky we are to have a Sweet Jesus who took the wrath of our sins on the cross so that we could receive this amazing love. It is in a word unfathomable that he did such a thing, but how grateful I am. I am sure I will never be thankful enough, or fully understand the wrath that He endured on the cross, so that we may be free… but nevertheless, I am in constant awe of His grace and kindness.
I just found out that one of my dear friends, April, has cancer. This type of cancer is very rare, and can not be treated with chemo or radiation. I cannot say enough about this woman’s character and love for the Lord. Her faith is unwavering, and the way she is handling this all is far beyond I can even fathom. I have no clue how I would handle such news, but she knows that this is all apart of the Lords will. As much as I know that the Lord is in control, it is hard for me to have that kind of faith sometimes. I cannot tell you enough about April and her sweet character that she has shown me in just the little time that we have known one another, but in one word she is Faithful to our sweet Jesus. She knows his plan is far better than ours, and his will will prevail above our own. I ask you to pray for April. She is an amazing 22 year old woman who loves the Lord deeply and would appreciate your prayers for COMPLETE healing. I know prayer works. I pray that you will see this and commit to pray for her. She is an amazing woman is who is going to do great things for the Lord. I also ask that you pray for her pain levels. The tumor is on her muscle, which I can guess is VERY painful. They are going back in in a couple of weeks to remove more of the tumor. Cutting into the muscle is supposed to be a very painful process, so I just ask that you also pray that her pain level is minimal with all of these procedures going on.
I know I have put this on here before, but I would like to leave you with two songs…. Love you guys.
“Waiting Room”
I will run, I cannot walk. I will sing when there is no song, I will pray when there is no prayer. I will listen when I cannot hear. Sitting in the waiting room of silence. Waiting for that still, soft voice I know. Offering my words to the roof tops in your house… trusting that this closet’s where you are.
Lord, I know if you change my mind, you will change my heart in time. Soveriegn Lord, this time is from you. So, I sit in the waiting room of silence. Because its all about you.
I will fight, I cannot fear. I will trust when you don’t seem real. I tell when I cannot speak. I will step when I cannot see. Sitting in the waiting room of Silence, waiting for that still, soft voice I know. Offering my words up to the rooftops in your house. Trusting that this closet is where you are….
Lord I know if you change my mind, you will change my heart in time. Soveriegn Lord this time is from you, so I sit in the waiting room.
“My Hope”
You’re All I need. Apart from you, I can’t breathe. You’re all I need. Apart from you, I can’t see that… I’m broken, and bent sin, I’m desperate, and dirty within. I’m broken, and bent to sin. I’m desperate, and dirty within. You are my Hope! You are my Joy! You are my reason for living!!
Wednesday, March 26, 2008
Be careful...
First of all, can I just say that I am listening to my IPOD right now on shuffle, and a Christmas song came on!! :) I LOVE Christmas music, and I am totally not changing the song ;) he he.... okay, I digress....
Hello, all!! I really don't have a specific thing to blog about, but, nonetheless, feel like blogging, so here we go!!!
So, I have been up at DBU the past few days, because the Swafford household (aka the house I am living at right now) is having a bit of a problem with our computers. I have been filling out applications online for teaching positions, and can i just tell you they take FOREVER and a DAY!! Okay, so maybe not that long, but I am not exaggerating when I say that they are LONG. One took me about 2 and half hours, and I didn't even finish yesterday. BOOO!! But, oh well, if I can get a job interview from filling one of these babies out, then I know it is worth it!! I have a job fair in Coppell this weekend. It is on Saturday and starts at 7:45 in the morning. I know... can we say early. Oh well, I AM PRAYING that I will get a job. They are offering contracts if the interviews go well!! What seems to be the hardest part of this whole job thing right now is that there are only a limited amount of English Teacher openings for 8-12. I went to a job fair at UTA and it was a bit discouraging... but I know, and am trying to trust that the Lord is and WILL provide the right job when it is time.
Last night I attended the DBU baseball game and saw a bunch of friends, and one of my friends received a text message to pass along. It said to be careful if any of us were going out into Dallas last night because it was gang initation night and there were random car that were being marked to be shot at, and some to be bumped into, only for the person to be pulled over, shot at, and the care stolen. So.... we all heard this, and of course were scared, but just took the information and went on. Well my friend that actually recieved the text message actually got her car marked last night (or we are guessing that is what happened.) Below is the letter she sent out to quite a few people.... I cannot believe that this happened. I think we sometimes forget that Dallas is quite a dangerous place... or at least, I guess I do. I inserted the letter below because she tells the story better than I do. Please be praying for her.. her name is Kelly.
I really do not have much else to say. Everyone be careful, and stay safe. I am going to go back and work on my interviewing stuff. Please be in prayer for me about my job interview this weekend. That would be awesome if I got a job in Coppell because it is closer to The Village (my church)!! I know I have been promising to blog about what the Lord is doing, and I really will do that soon. The Lord is just doing so much right now, it is hard to all get it down onto, well, blogging form.
Love you guys,
Ashie
Hello, all!! I really don't have a specific thing to blog about, but, nonetheless, feel like blogging, so here we go!!!
So, I have been up at DBU the past few days, because the Swafford household (aka the house I am living at right now) is having a bit of a problem with our computers. I have been filling out applications online for teaching positions, and can i just tell you they take FOREVER and a DAY!! Okay, so maybe not that long, but I am not exaggerating when I say that they are LONG. One took me about 2 and half hours, and I didn't even finish yesterday. BOOO!! But, oh well, if I can get a job interview from filling one of these babies out, then I know it is worth it!! I have a job fair in Coppell this weekend. It is on Saturday and starts at 7:45 in the morning. I know... can we say early. Oh well, I AM PRAYING that I will get a job. They are offering contracts if the interviews go well!! What seems to be the hardest part of this whole job thing right now is that there are only a limited amount of English Teacher openings for 8-12. I went to a job fair at UTA and it was a bit discouraging... but I know, and am trying to trust that the Lord is and WILL provide the right job when it is time.
Last night I attended the DBU baseball game and saw a bunch of friends, and one of my friends received a text message to pass along. It said to be careful if any of us were going out into Dallas last night because it was gang initation night and there were random car that were being marked to be shot at, and some to be bumped into, only for the person to be pulled over, shot at, and the care stolen. So.... we all heard this, and of course were scared, but just took the information and went on. Well my friend that actually recieved the text message actually got her car marked last night (or we are guessing that is what happened.) Below is the letter she sent out to quite a few people.... I cannot believe that this happened. I think we sometimes forget that Dallas is quite a dangerous place... or at least, I guess I do. I inserted the letter below because she tells the story better than I do. Please be praying for her.. her name is Kelly.
Yesterday was a normal day and all seemed well. A group of us went out to eat for Nicks birthday lastnight. I received a text message from a friend that read not to drive in the Dallas area that Gangs all over were doing gang initiation and would shoot at random cars(a message their professor had told them in class that night). It made me really think and I was very cautious last night. Another friend at the restaurant said he had heard about gangs doing "bump and runs" where they will bump into your car so you will pull over and then shoot you and steal your vehicle. All of us talked about all of the dangers that were out in Dallas and were just kind of talking lightly about it all, with the attitude it would never happen to any of us. If I had only known at that moment, Nick and I were about to go on the ride of our life.
Nick, Anna, and I left the restaurant and were going back to DBU campus(which is just a few minutes down the road from Oak Cliff). On I-20 exiting mountain creek parkway, I noticed a light blue 4 door car was slowing down in front of us and I told Nick do NOT show that you are turning onto Mt. Creek this is really wierd. So we did not use signals and went to turn at the very last minute when it appeared the blue car was passing the exit, when all of the sudden the car whipped in front of us crossing over the white lines and barely making the exit. Then we came up to the stop sign (where we needed to turn left) again I told Nick do NOT show them which direction we are turning, so Nick acted as if we were going to turn right and the blue car made a slow right turn and we immediatly made our left turn to go to campus. At this point the slow creepy car, which appeared to be following us in the front was out of sight, out of mind. This car was involved and apparently called up to gang member or theif who had the next step and that was to get us.
As we were approaching campus I noticed a new edition light blue colored expedition fish tailing down mt. creek and sped up the hill. I said OMG! Did yall see that! Right as we entered DBU gates, Nick and Anna noticed the expedition had hid behind the brick wall for us to pass and shut their lights off until we passed then, cut them on and followed us through campus all the way down to the apartments were Anna and I live. They passed the turn to our apartments, so being nieve we kind of let it go. Nick waited for me outside so I could come over and help him on a paper. As we were leaving campus, we looked behind us and there was that same expedition behind us. We continued on mt. creek parkway(which is the darkest, scariest and windiest road in Dallas). The following was from 11:45pm-1230am. As soon as we hit the darkness, the expedition cut their lights off and began to gain on us. Nick noticed and screamed "they are coming!!!" I just started screaming for my life, not knowing if we had another day to live. Honestly.
We continued on Mt.Creek and reached the top speed of 110 miles an hour, when out of no where and 18 wheeler pulled out in front of us, we came to a complete stop and the expedition was gaining on us. They then tried to pull up onto the driver side of the car(which we knew would be a shooting and lead to a car-jacking or our lifes). Nick hugged the middle of the road so they could not get beside us. Nick topped the speed on 100 mph when I called 911.
I was on the phone with 911 as we were being folllowed by a vehicle with their lights off(they would flick them on every 5 seconds for just a second so they could see). This road is the darkest of the darkest. We approached I-20 and took the turn at 70 mph and were on two wheels at this time but running for our lifes from these gang members. They continued to follow us onto I-20 at top speeds of 110 mph, they were going atleast 95 weaving in and out of traffic. 911 told us to keep driving and they had transferred us to G.P. 911, Dallas 911, back to G.P. 911 then we told them we were continuing to Arlington until we could lose the followers.
We then noticed a police officer was pulling someone over and I screamed at Nick and said go go go pull in behind that police car and we cut on our hazards. They grabbed their guns and started running our plates and right away 5 police cars piled in behind us in response to our 911 call.
They got all of our information and told us we did the right thing, But since the car was no longer behind us(which they probably left us when they saw us with 6 police cars around us) they could not help us out. They sent us on our way and out of fear and not knowing if whoever the people were, were out to get us, kill us, car-jack my car or What. We drove to Clifton for the night and left the city.
We got home at 2 in the morning and my dad noticed my license plate was bent as if it was a mark done at the restaurant we were at to follow our vehicle.
I honestly know that the Lords presence is with us in our lifes always. He saved our lifes last night. God was working through Nick to control my car at 110mph and not wreck. We had no choice, we would never drive at the speed. But this was an honest LIFE OR death situation. Someone was out to get us, our car, kill us, or car-jack us. There is no telling with the Gangs that were out. This may be one thing we will never find out.
I ask for prayers for Nick and I and other DBU students who might be traveling on the same dark road. Please be aware of your surroundings at all times and keep the Lord close to your heart. He is our only safety net in life and the only one who keeps us safe and from danger. I know praying is very powerful and I encourage you to pray today. The Lord is with all of us everyday and we definitely had guardian angels around us last night.
Sorry if their is a lot of typos, we stayed wide awake all night in fear and I have had prob. 45 minutes of sleep total.
I am very sick and I have been throwing up all morning just not knowing if they were looking for me, nick, or just wanted my hummer. But my hummer is never going to dallas again it is staying in Clifton and I am getting a safer car thats not so much of a target to the aweful people in the world we live in.
This has altered my opinion of living in Dallas and I don't know if I should continue my senior year online and live at home. But this was one of those life changing experiences and we could have been gone in a second.
Thank you for your prayers and please dont ever be vulnerable to this kind of attack. There are always wierdos lurking in darkness and target college girls especially or nice vehicles.
I love you all...
Nick, Anna, and I left the restaurant and were going back to DBU campus(which is just a few minutes down the road from Oak Cliff). On I-20 exiting mountain creek parkway, I noticed a light blue 4 door car was slowing down in front of us and I told Nick do NOT show that you are turning onto Mt. Creek this is really wierd. So we did not use signals and went to turn at the very last minute when it appeared the blue car was passing the exit, when all of the sudden the car whipped in front of us crossing over the white lines and barely making the exit. Then we came up to the stop sign (where we needed to turn left) again I told Nick do NOT show them which direction we are turning, so Nick acted as if we were going to turn right and the blue car made a slow right turn and we immediatly made our left turn to go to campus. At this point the slow creepy car, which appeared to be following us in the front was out of sight, out of mind. This car was involved and apparently called up to gang member or theif who had the next step and that was to get us.
As we were approaching campus I noticed a new edition light blue colored expedition fish tailing down mt. creek and sped up the hill. I said OMG! Did yall see that! Right as we entered DBU gates, Nick and Anna noticed the expedition had hid behind the brick wall for us to pass and shut their lights off until we passed then, cut them on and followed us through campus all the way down to the apartments were Anna and I live. They passed the turn to our apartments, so being nieve we kind of let it go. Nick waited for me outside so I could come over and help him on a paper. As we were leaving campus, we looked behind us and there was that same expedition behind us. We continued on mt. creek parkway(which is the darkest, scariest and windiest road in Dallas). The following was from 11:45pm-1230am. As soon as we hit the darkness, the expedition cut their lights off and began to gain on us. Nick noticed and screamed "they are coming!!!" I just started screaming for my life, not knowing if we had another day to live. Honestly.
We continued on Mt.Creek and reached the top speed of 110 miles an hour, when out of no where and 18 wheeler pulled out in front of us, we came to a complete stop and the expedition was gaining on us. They then tried to pull up onto the driver side of the car(which we knew would be a shooting and lead to a car-jacking or our lifes). Nick hugged the middle of the road so they could not get beside us. Nick topped the speed on 100 mph when I called 911.
I was on the phone with 911 as we were being folllowed by a vehicle with their lights off(they would flick them on every 5 seconds for just a second so they could see). This road is the darkest of the darkest. We approached I-20 and took the turn at 70 mph and were on two wheels at this time but running for our lifes from these gang members. They continued to follow us onto I-20 at top speeds of 110 mph, they were going atleast 95 weaving in and out of traffic. 911 told us to keep driving and they had transferred us to G.P. 911, Dallas 911, back to G.P. 911 then we told them we were continuing to Arlington until we could lose the followers.
We then noticed a police officer was pulling someone over and I screamed at Nick and said go go go pull in behind that police car and we cut on our hazards. They grabbed their guns and started running our plates and right away 5 police cars piled in behind us in response to our 911 call.
They got all of our information and told us we did the right thing, But since the car was no longer behind us(which they probably left us when they saw us with 6 police cars around us) they could not help us out. They sent us on our way and out of fear and not knowing if whoever the people were, were out to get us, kill us, car-jack my car or What. We drove to Clifton for the night and left the city.
We got home at 2 in the morning and my dad noticed my license plate was bent as if it was a mark done at the restaurant we were at to follow our vehicle.
I honestly know that the Lords presence is with us in our lifes always. He saved our lifes last night. God was working through Nick to control my car at 110mph and not wreck. We had no choice, we would never drive at the speed. But this was an honest LIFE OR death situation. Someone was out to get us, our car, kill us, or car-jack us. There is no telling with the Gangs that were out. This may be one thing we will never find out.
I ask for prayers for Nick and I and other DBU students who might be traveling on the same dark road. Please be aware of your surroundings at all times and keep the Lord close to your heart. He is our only safety net in life and the only one who keeps us safe and from danger. I know praying is very powerful and I encourage you to pray today. The Lord is with all of us everyday and we definitely had guardian angels around us last night.
Sorry if their is a lot of typos, we stayed wide awake all night in fear and I have had prob. 45 minutes of sleep total.
I am very sick and I have been throwing up all morning just not knowing if they were looking for me, nick, or just wanted my hummer. But my hummer is never going to dallas again it is staying in Clifton and I am getting a safer car thats not so much of a target to the aweful people in the world we live in.
This has altered my opinion of living in Dallas and I don't know if I should continue my senior year online and live at home. But this was one of those life changing experiences and we could have been gone in a second.
Thank you for your prayers and please dont ever be vulnerable to this kind of attack. There are always wierdos lurking in darkness and target college girls especially or nice vehicles.
I love you all...
I really do not have much else to say. Everyone be careful, and stay safe. I am going to go back and work on my interviewing stuff. Please be in prayer for me about my job interview this weekend. That would be awesome if I got a job in Coppell because it is closer to The Village (my church)!! I know I have been promising to blog about what the Lord is doing, and I really will do that soon. The Lord is just doing so much right now, it is hard to all get it down onto, well, blogging form.
Love you guys,
Ashie
Friday, March 21, 2008
Praise JESUS!!
I PASSED MY TEXES EXAM (AKA TEACHING TEST)!!! hootie hootie hooo :)
LOVE YOU ALL, thanks for the prayers, and most of all, thank JESUS I passed!!! yAH!! :)
LOVE YOU ALL, thanks for the prayers, and most of all, thank JESUS I passed!!! yAH!! :)
Monday, March 17, 2008
I think I owe y'all an update!!
Hello everyone!! :) Or should I say good evening... I am currently on my spring break (the kids in mansfield have spring break this week, which means so dooo iiiii babbbaayyy!! ) so I can stay up as late as I want!! WOOO HOOOO!!
Anyways, I thought I would just write a quick update of all that is going on my life for all 5 of you that look at this ;)
1. I am growing my hair out. yes, i know, this may not be worthy of being my number 1 update, but nobody seems to think that I will stick to growing out my hair. (prob because i always cut it... but i miss it long soooooo, I AM GROWING IT OUT!!) hopefully by summer i can at least get it all in a pony tail without all the hairs falling out of the hairtie :)
2. The Lord is doing A LOT right now. When I mean A LOT, i mean like tearing down walls I did not know I had, and showing me things I did not know that I needed to work on. It has been good, but hard. Bittersweet would be a good word perhaps? I am learning how much of a hypocrite I am in so many areas, and how I try to CONTROL everything. It is scary how much i want to be in control of everything. I even do it in suttle ways, or maybe I just believe they are suttle, but its even in just constantly making sure everyone is okay. I don't want anyone to ever be sad, upset, anything... I want to take care of everyone. In in my head, I guess I seem to think that if I don't take care of them, they will not be okay.... which, my friends, is not true!! The Lord has got them... not me. Hard lesson... the Lord is just teaching me so much. So if you could just be prayer for things he is revealing to me... and that I will stay in the word and absorb, think and pray over these things, instead of running away from it?? I have found it is a lot easier just to try to keep myself busy with other things, because when I actually get in The Word, the Lord hits me right between the eyes with a lot of things. Which... don't get me wrong, I am thankful for, but it is easy with my "want to make everything okay" tendency to just brush it under the rug, and pretend it is not there. So, again, Prayer!?!?!
3. I had strepp throat most of last week, and I now am much better!! It figures as soon as I don't have insurance, I start getting sick!! I am thankful for the fact that I was able to go to the doctor and get some meds!! Thank you JESUS!!
4. I don't know if all of you know this, but I am going through this Bible Study at my church (The Village) and I am sooo thankful for not only the study, but the people that are in my life through this ministry. The ministry that it is through at the church is called Recovery at the Village. What we do is go through a "Step Study" that is pretty much a biblical approach to the twelve steps that most people go through, say in AA. But this step study is for ANYONE. for sin issues all the way from fear to pride to overeating/eating disorders. This is what has been able to pinpoint sooo many of my sin issues. The Lord is competly working through this study!! :)
5. I have not recieved my results from my teXes exam, so I am just TRYING to be patient in thier arrival. I am nervous... I do not want to have failed. YEs, you can always retake it... but I would like to have passed. So... I will let you know when I get those in ;)
6. Job Fairs and Interviews are coming up for different High Schools!! I will also keep you all updated on this as well!!
Well, friends, I love you all very much, but I am a sleepy girl! I will post more in depth, and interesting things soon!! Please, if you think about it, pray for me this week. The Lord is really working, so just pray I am responsive to what He is trying to get through to me! LOVE YOU ALL!! :)
Anyways, I thought I would just write a quick update of all that is going on my life for all 5 of you that look at this ;)
1. I am growing my hair out. yes, i know, this may not be worthy of being my number 1 update, but nobody seems to think that I will stick to growing out my hair. (prob because i always cut it... but i miss it long soooooo, I AM GROWING IT OUT!!) hopefully by summer i can at least get it all in a pony tail without all the hairs falling out of the hairtie :)
2. The Lord is doing A LOT right now. When I mean A LOT, i mean like tearing down walls I did not know I had, and showing me things I did not know that I needed to work on. It has been good, but hard. Bittersweet would be a good word perhaps? I am learning how much of a hypocrite I am in so many areas, and how I try to CONTROL everything. It is scary how much i want to be in control of everything. I even do it in suttle ways, or maybe I just believe they are suttle, but its even in just constantly making sure everyone is okay. I don't want anyone to ever be sad, upset, anything... I want to take care of everyone. In in my head, I guess I seem to think that if I don't take care of them, they will not be okay.... which, my friends, is not true!! The Lord has got them... not me. Hard lesson... the Lord is just teaching me so much. So if you could just be prayer for things he is revealing to me... and that I will stay in the word and absorb, think and pray over these things, instead of running away from it?? I have found it is a lot easier just to try to keep myself busy with other things, because when I actually get in The Word, the Lord hits me right between the eyes with a lot of things. Which... don't get me wrong, I am thankful for, but it is easy with my "want to make everything okay" tendency to just brush it under the rug, and pretend it is not there. So, again, Prayer!?!?!
3. I had strepp throat most of last week, and I now am much better!! It figures as soon as I don't have insurance, I start getting sick!! I am thankful for the fact that I was able to go to the doctor and get some meds!! Thank you JESUS!!
4. I don't know if all of you know this, but I am going through this Bible Study at my church (The Village) and I am sooo thankful for not only the study, but the people that are in my life through this ministry. The ministry that it is through at the church is called Recovery at the Village. What we do is go through a "Step Study" that is pretty much a biblical approach to the twelve steps that most people go through, say in AA. But this step study is for ANYONE. for sin issues all the way from fear to pride to overeating/eating disorders. This is what has been able to pinpoint sooo many of my sin issues. The Lord is competly working through this study!! :)
5. I have not recieved my results from my teXes exam, so I am just TRYING to be patient in thier arrival. I am nervous... I do not want to have failed. YEs, you can always retake it... but I would like to have passed. So... I will let you know when I get those in ;)
6. Job Fairs and Interviews are coming up for different High Schools!! I will also keep you all updated on this as well!!
Well, friends, I love you all very much, but I am a sleepy girl! I will post more in depth, and interesting things soon!! Please, if you think about it, pray for me this week. The Lord is really working, so just pray I am responsive to what He is trying to get through to me! LOVE YOU ALL!! :)
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